Love is……..

What does it mean to love somebody?

What it means to love somebody is going to be different for each person you ask. Love really is quite hard to explain, but according to the New American Bible, love is “Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, love is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. If there are prophecies, they will be brought to nothing; if tongues, they will cease; if knowledge, it will be brought to nothing,” (1 Corinthians 13:4-8).

Simple, right?

If only.

I mean, I can tell you I love my husband, my children, my siblings, my parents, aunts, cousins, uncles, grandparents, the list goes on. I love my fellow humans and I love my neighbors…..SMH, I don’t even really know my neighbors so isn’t it hard to really say we love someone we don’t even know. I mean, really, do I care if my neighbors’ grandma dies or if my neighbor is bitten by a venomous snake with all potential to die? Probably not like I would care if it were someone I truly loved. So, does that mean I don’t love my neighbor? If so, how do I begin to love all people in such a way?

I look at the world I am surrounded by things I hate: murder, mayhem, riots, abortion, drunkenness, crooked politicians, freedoms and rights under our constitution being sucked from us almost daily, drugs on every corner and so much more scary chaos, but then I also see the joy on a child’s face as the glare of the sun beats down from above, the butterflies wisping through the fresh spring air as it envelopes us to welcome the warmth of spring, a baby suckling from his mama’s breast, the squeals and laughter of children running through the freshly cut grass, elderly couples walking hand-in-hand along the river and a grandmother playing a game of cards with her young grandchildren……these are some of the things I say I love.

But, is love really the right word to express the joy that these things bring? Hmmm…..

Let’s go back to WHO I love –

As I said, I love my husband, my children, my sibling, family, etc? But with each of these different people, I have been or shown some:

• impatient and unkind
• jealousy and pompousness
• inflated – not exactly sure what that means, but definitely rude
• sought my own interests at times
• been quick-tempered and quick to rile
• broodiness and wrongdoing
• and I have not always been truthful in things (for selfish and unselfish reasons).

But even so, I still claim that I love all of these people.

How can that be so?

Because even though I have done or shown the above actions or behaviors, I have also shown and done the opposite just as much if not more so. Now, I don’t pretend to be something that I am not. I am a sinner, every day of my life. I don’t say that with pride or malice or joy or any feeling really. I simply say it as it is. I know I am a sinner, but every day I strive to be a better person than I was yesterday.

So, yes, Love really is that simple and that complicated.

Now, let’s talk about being on the receiving side of love. What does it mean to receive love?
Hmm, I’m not sure I have a definitive answer for that, either. However, I like to believe (notice I said like….) that we receive love by appreciating the person who is offering love. We appreciate by trusting someone’s words of kindness, embracing the love being offered (love in action, word, deed, touch, gifts, and time), ignoring the doubts in one’s mind, letting go of the belief that someone should love you as much as you love them, and letting go of fear.

When I think about my children, I love them without fear. I accept what they offer without fear. I don’t measure their love not do I measure mine. I just love with my whole heart and let them love me in return.

BUT, I have had feelings of unworthiness. I have felt that they deserve so much better than me even though I truly believe that nobody will ever love them like I do. I have gone through different stages in my motherhood years. I have felt accomplished in more ways than one as a mother, but I have also felt like a failure in more ways than one.

In the end, I do the best I can each day and just try to do better than I did the day before.

Love is beautiful.