Day 12

One of the hardest things about being a parent is knowing that we can’t always see what our children are carrying.

We can see their faces.

We can see whether they got out of bed.

We can see whether they ate dinner, did their schoolwork, went to practice or laughed at the dinner table.

But we can’t see everything happening inside their hearts.

And sometimes a child will tell us they’re hurting in a way that doesn’t look serious to us.

“This is just a friendship problem.”

“It’s teenage drama.”

“They’re being overly sensitive.”

“They’ll get over it.”

Maybe they will.

But that doesn’t mean what they’re feeling right now isn’t real.

As a mom, I’ve learned that my job isn’t to decide whether my child’s pain is big enough to deserve my attention.

My job is to listen.

If my child says, “I’m overwhelmed,” I want to hear them.

If they say, “I feel like nobody cares,” I don’t want my first response to be a list of all the people who love them.

I want to understand why they feel that way.

If they say, “I don’t want to be here anymore,” I don’t want to assume they’re being dramatic.

I want to stop everything and listen.

Because I would rather take something seriously that turns out to be temporary than dismiss something that was a cry for help.

Our children don’t need parents who can read minds.

They need parents who are willing to believe them enough to ask another question.

“Tell me more.”

And if what they tell us is bigger than anything we know how to handle, we don’t have to handle it alone.

We can bring in a counselor, doctor, trusted adult, crisis support or whoever can help keep them safe.

Getting help isn’t an admission that we failed as parents.

Sometimes it’s one of the most loving things we can do.

So when your child tells you they’re hurting, don’t make them prove it.

Listen.

Believe them.

Stay close.

And let them know that no matter how messy, frightening or uncomfortable the conversation becomes, they will never have to face it alone.

#SuicidePreventionMonth #SuicideAwareness #ListenToYourKids #BelieveThem #YouAreNotAlone